Roast My Stash

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Logline

Submit a photo of your stash. Professor High scores its terpene diversity from 1 to 100, calls out the obvious gaps, and praises the surprises. Status game disguised as a content engine. Drives stash-tracking behavior in the High IQ app as a side effect.

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Concept

Roast My Stash works because the audience does the work. Followers send photos of their current cannabis stash - jars, bags, shelves, whatever - and Professor High runs each lineup through a terpene-diversity analysis. The result is a numerical score and a verdict: roast, praise, or somewhere in between. Top scores get featured. Bad scores get redemption arcs. The status mechanic is the engine. A 92 from Professor High is a flex. A 41 is a reason to fix the stash and resubmit. Either way, the audience is engaged with the same content for two cycles. Featuring the top scores monthly creates a leaderboard, and the leaderboard creates a community. The side effect is the real long-term play. Every submission requires the user to look at their stash like a portfolio. That is exactly the behavior the High IQ stash-tracking feature is built for. The show ends every episode with a soft route into the app.

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Why It Works

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Format

Total runtime: 30 to 60 seconds per stash, three to five stashes per episode in carousel form on Instagram, single-stash on TikTok.

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Platforms

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Cadence

Three to five per week. Volume is the lever. The more stashes get scored, the more submissions arrive.

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Example Episodes

The Diversity Problem. Four strains, all from the same High Family. Score lands in the low 40s. Professor High walks through why a stash that looks varied can be chemically monotonous, and which two strains would push the score above 70. A Beginner’s First Stash. A submitter who just started building a collection. Score is honest but generous. The episode pivots into a what-to-add-next checklist - the most useful entry-point stash to grow from. The Best Submission This Month. Top score of the month, featured with full ceremony. Top 1% terpene diversity. Submitter handle pinned. Sets the bar for the leaderboard. Connoisseur Edition. Submissions accepted only with deep-cut strains. No top-100 staples. Average score is higher because the audience has self-selected. The episode becomes a tour of strains most viewers have never heard of. The Limonene-Overload Pattern. A specific failure mode. One strain so dominant in limonene that it crashes the diversity score by itself. Professor High names the pattern, names the fix, and names two terpene profiles that would balance the lineup.

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Production Notes

Build the diversity overlay as a fixed graphic - terpene bars, unique-terpene count, family distribution. Numbers are fed in per submission so the visual stays consistent. Score animation is the climax of every episode. Drop in a 1-to-100 number with a tick-up animation, then stamp ROAST or PRAISE on top. Submissions are accepted via a single link in bio (a form that captures the photo, the strains in the stash, and a handle for credit). Build a submissions queue in the social-content-drafts pipeline so episode assembly is templated. Closing line is consistent: “Submit yours via the link. Track your stash in High IQ.”

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Hashtags & Discovery

Primary: #roastmystash #stashreview #cannabiscollection #cannabiscommunity TikTok push: cross-tag #weedtok and #stashcheck. Instagram push: pin a Story highlight with submission instructions, score-card examples, and a leaderboard.

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Success Metrics

• Submissions per week above 50 by week eight
• App-link click-through above 4% per episode
• Repeat submissions (same handle, new stash) above 15% of the active submitter pool
• Median comment count above 100 per episode

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Pillar

Community & Engagement - with a meaningful overlap into Strain Intel. The submissions are community. The diversity scoring is the data layer.

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Status

concept

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