The Outsider Confession — Scripts

Professor High — THE OUTSIDER CONFESSION — OUT-001
Runtime: 20 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE OUTSIDER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-outsider-v1 if you have built it, or cast
  ANY Cantina character who reads as: bright, tidy and sincere, talks straight
  down the lens like a selfie video.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: This is a CONFESSION VIDEO, not a sketch. The Outsider talks straight
down the lens like she is posting to her own account — slightly embarrassed,
laughing at herself, completely likeable. She is smart and was wrong. She is
NEVER mocked.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD on her already mid-confession, with "Okay so."
No title card, no logo, no narration first. No on-screen text until the final
beat.

IMPORTANT — SHOT STYLE: her shots should feel like a phone selfie video — a
loose static medium, slightly imperfect framing, plain domestic background.
This deliberately contrasts with Professor High's locked lab compositions.

IMPORTANT — PROFESSOR HIGH IS BARELY IN THIS. Two lines at the end. He does
not explain, correct, or elaborate.

ENVIRONMENT: A plain domestic room for the Outsider, then Professor High's
lab. No brands or logos. NOTHING smoked, held or consumed on camera. No
product or packaging visible.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:06) COLD OPEN. Static medium, selfie framing. THE OUTSIDER direct
   to lens, mortified and amused at herself.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "Okay so. This whole time. I genuinely thought indica and
   sativa were, like, two different chemicals."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:06-0:14) Same framing, held. She keeps going, building.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "Like I thought there was an indica molecule. And you'd
   look at the label and it would say which molecule was in it. And everyone
   kept saying the words like they meant something, so I never asked."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
3. (0:14-0:18) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan,
   entirely without smugness.
   SAYS (PROF): "She was reasoning correctly. Everyone did say them like they
   meant something."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
4. (0:18-0:20) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "The terpenes are the part that is real. This is why I'm
   high."
   ON SCREEN: THIS IS WHY I'M HIGH

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Final beat only. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy
stroke, lower third. 250px clear at bottom, 120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. NO music under the Outsider's shots — just room tone,
like a real confession video. Sparse strings enter only with Professor High.

DO NOT: No smoking, no product, no packaging, no paraphernalia. No medical
claims. Never mock the Outsider. No real brand, dispensary or producer names.

Professor High — THE OUTSIDER CONFESSION — OUT-002
Runtime: 18 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE OUTSIDER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-outsider-v1 if you have built it, or cast
  ANY Cantina character who reads as: bright, tidy and sincere, talks straight
  down the lens like a selfie video.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Confession video. Sincere, self-deprecating, likeable. Never mocked.
Professor High's closing line is a genuine compliment, not a punchline at her
expense.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD, already mid-confession. No title card, no
logo. No on-screen text before 0:13.

IMPORTANT — SHOT STYLE: her shots are loose selfie-framed statics with a plain
domestic background; his are locked lab compositions. The contrast is the
point.

IMPORTANT — PROFESSOR HIGH IS BARELY IN THIS. Two short lines at the end.

ENVIRONMENT: A plain domestic room, then Professor High's lab. No brands or
logos. NOTHING smoked, held or consumed. No product or packaging visible.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:06) COLD OPEN. Static medium, selfie framing. THE OUTSIDER direct
   to lens, wincing at herself.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "I want to be honest about something. For about a year I
   thought the percentage on the jar was, like, a quality score. Out of a
   hundred."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:06-0:13) Same framing, held.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "So I'm standing there going 'twenty-two percent? That's a
   D.' And nobody ever said anything. Because why would they. It's a number on
   a shelf with no units."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
3. (0:13-0:16) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   Single card, lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "Twenty and a half is the average. Twenty-two is a good one."
   ON SCREEN: AVERAGE: 20.5%
4. (0:16-0:18) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "She was closer than the people who knew. This is why I'm
   high."
   ON SCREEN: THIS IS WHY I'M HIGH

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 3 and 4. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy stroke,
lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on "20.5%". 250px clear at bottom, 120px
at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. No music under her shots — room tone only. Strings
enter with Professor High.

DO NOT: No smoking, no product, no packaging, no paraphernalia. No medical
claims. Never mock the Outsider. No real brand, dispensary or producer names.

Professor High — THE OUTSIDER CONFESSION — OUT-003
Runtime: 19 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE OUTSIDER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-outsider-v1 if you have built it, or cast
  ANY Cantina character who reads as: bright, tidy and sincere, talks straight
  down the lens like a selfie video.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Confession video. She is genuinely thrown rather than embarrassed here —
this is the episode where the confession turns into indignation, which is the
share driver.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD, already mid-confession. No title card, no
logo. No on-screen text before 0:14.

IMPORTANT — SHOT STYLE: loose selfie-framed statics for her, locked lab
compositions for him.

IMPORTANT — PROFESSOR HIGH IS BARELY IN THIS.

ENVIRONMENT: A plain domestic room, then Professor High's lab. No brands or
logos. NOTHING smoked, held or consumed. No product or packaging visible.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:06) COLD OPEN. Static medium, selfie framing.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "So I assumed — and I don't know why I assumed this — that
   there was, like, a body. That registered the names."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:06-0:14) Same framing, held. Building into indignation.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "Like a kennel club. And if two things are both called the
   same thing, that means something. And apparently it means nothing? Anyone
   can call anything anything?"
   ON SCREEN: nothing
3. (0:14-0:17) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   Single card, lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "Correct. Two jars, same name, nothing chemically in common.
   Entirely legal, entirely normal."
   ON SCREEN: NO REGISTRY EXISTS
4. (0:17-0:19) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "Read the panel. Save that. This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: THIS IS WHY I'M HIGH

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 3 and 4. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy stroke,
lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on "NO". 250px clear at bottom, 120px at
top.

AUDIO: Original sound. No music under her shots. Strings enter with Professor
High.

DO NOT: No smoking, no product, no packaging, no paraphernalia. No medical
claims. Never mock the Outsider. No real brand, dispensary, producer or
regulator names.

Professor High — THE OUTSIDER CONFESSION — OUT-004
Runtime: 21 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE OUTSIDER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-outsider-v1 if you have built it, or cast
  ANY Cantina character who reads as: bright, tidy and sincere, talks straight
  down the lens like a selfie video.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Confession video. This is the meta episode — she is confessing about
THIS ACCOUNT. She is delighted and mortified in equal measure. Professor High
is entirely unbothered by the reveal and does not defend himself.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD, already mid-confession. No title card, no
logo. No on-screen text until the final beat.

IMPORTANT — Professor High must NOT react comically to being called a
pineapple. He confirms it flatly, as a fact of no particular interest. Breaking
character to acknowledge the joke would kill it.

IMPORTANT — SHOT STYLE: loose selfie-framed statics for her, locked lab
compositions for him.

ENVIRONMENT: A plain domestic room, then Professor High's lab. No brands or
logos. NOTHING smoked, held or consumed. No product or packaging visible.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:06) COLD OPEN. Static medium, selfie framing. One hand half over
   her face.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "I have to say this. I followed this account for four
   months and I genuinely thought he was a real professor."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:06-0:15) Same framing, held. Accelerating.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "Because the numbers were right. I checked one. It was
   right! So my brain just went, sure, that's a scientist. I did not clock the
   — I did not clock that he's a pineapple. For four months."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
3. (0:15-0:19) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan,
   entirely unbothered.
   SAYS (PROF): "The numbers are still right. That was the part that
   mattered."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
4. (0:19-0:21) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "I am a pineapple. This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: THIS IS WHY I'M HIGH

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Final beat only. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy
stroke, lower third. 250px clear at bottom, 120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. No music under her shots. Strings enter with Professor
High.

DO NOT: No smoking, no product, no packaging, no paraphernalia. No medical
claims. Professor High must not wink, smirk, or acknowledge the bit. Never
mock the Outsider. No real brand names.

Professor High — THE OUTSIDER CONFESSION — OUT-005
Runtime: 17 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE OUTSIDER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-outsider-v1 if you have built it, or cast
  ANY Cantina character who reads as: bright, tidy and sincere, talks straight
  down the lens like a selfie video.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Confession video. The smallest stakes in the pack and the most purely
affectionate. She is mortified about something trivial.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD, already mid-confession. No title card, no
logo. No on-screen text before 0:12.

IMPORTANT — The mispronunciation "car-YO-phyllene" must be clearly audible and
clearly wrong. Professor High never repeats it correctly on camera — he simply
does not comment on it, which is funnier and kinder than a correction.

IMPORTANT — SHOT STYLE: loose selfie-framed statics for her, locked lab
compositions for him.

ENVIRONMENT: A plain domestic room, then Professor High's lab. No brands or
logos. NOTHING smoked, held or consumed. No product or packaging visible.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:06) COLD OPEN. Static medium, selfie framing, eyes shut in
   embarrassment.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "Two years. Two years I have been walking into places and
   saying 'car-YO-phyllene.' Out loud. To professionals."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:06-0:12) Same framing, held.
   SAYS (OUTSIDER): "And not one person corrected me. Which means either they
   were being kind, or — and I think this is it — nobody there knew either."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
3. (0:12-0:15) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   Single card, lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "It is the second one. It leads about one strain in seven and
   almost nobody says it out loud."
   ON SCREEN: CARYOPHYLLENE - 1 IN 7
4. (0:15-0:17) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "Say it wrong loudly. This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: THIS IS WHY I'M HIGH

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 3 and 4. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy stroke,
lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on "1 IN 7". 250px clear at bottom,
120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. No music under her shots. Strings enter with Professor
High.

DO NOT: No smoking, no product, no packaging, no paraphernalia. No medical
claims. Never mock the Outsider and never have Professor High correct her
pronunciation on camera. No real brand or dispensary names.