The Taxonomy — Scripts

Professor High — THE TAXONOMY — TAX-001
Runtime: 18 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE MAXIMIZER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-maximizer-v1 if you have built it, or
  cast ANY Cantina character who reads as: confident, decisive and completely
  wrong — optimising for the biggest number.
- THE FIRST-TIMER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-first-timer-v1 if you have built it, or
  cast ANY Cantina character who reads as: small, upright and sincere, asks
  the question nobody else will.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Nature-documentary deadpan — literally a species-identification segment.
CRITICAL: Professor High shows NO preference between the two types. He names
both with identical respect. He must never imply one is correct.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD on both characters already at the board, both
mid-question. No title card, no logo. No on-screen text before 0:11.

ENVIRONMENT: A stylized generic dispensary, backlit menu board of invented
names and percentages. No product visible. No real brand names or logos.
Professor High is cut in from his lab.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:05) COLD OPEN. Locked wide two-shot, both facing the board, asking
   at the same moment.
   SAYS (MAXIMIZER): "Which one's the highest?"
   SAYS (FIRST-TIMER): "Which one's got the limonene?"
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:05-0:11) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   SAYS (PROF): "Two species, one counter. The first buys the number. The
   second buys the profile. Both of them will have a nice evening and only one
   of them will be able to repeat it."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
3. (0:11-0:15) Same framing. A single two-word card enters the lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "Chasers optimise for intensity. Readers optimise for
   repeatability. Neither is wrong. They are answering different questions."
   ON SCREEN: CHASER - READER
4. (0:15-0:18) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "Which one are you. Be honest. This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: CHASER OR READER?

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 3 and 4 only. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy
stroke, lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on the labels. 250px clear at
bottom, 120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. Sparse nature-documentary strings.

DO NOT: No product visible. No smoking or consuming. No medical claims. No
real dispensary, brand, producer or lab names. Professor High must NOT endorse
either type.

Professor High — THE TAXONOMY — TAX-002
Runtime: 16 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE MAXIMIZER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-maximizer-v1 if you have built it, or
  cast ANY Cantina character who reads as: confident, decisive and completely
  wrong — optimising for the biggest number.
- THE ORACLE — SWAPPABLE. Use the-oracle-v1 if you have built it, or cast ANY
  Cantina character who reads as: reclined and generous, explains your own
  experience to you with total confidence.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Nature-documentary deadpan, species identification. Professor High shows
NO preference between the two types.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD on both already mid-evening. No title card, no
logo. No on-screen text before 0:05.

ENVIRONMENT: A stylized living room, plain couch, evening lamp light. No
brands or logos. NOTHING smoked, held or consumed on camera at any point. No
product or paraphernalia visible. Professor High is cut in from his lab.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:05) COLD OPEN. Locked wide two-shot on the couch. THE ORACLE is
   settling in comfortably; THE MAXIMIZER is already completely gone, staring
   at nothing.
   SAYS (ORACLE): "I'm pacing myself tonight."
   SAYS (MAXIMIZER): "I did mine at six."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:05-0:11) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   Single two-word card, lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "Grazers spread it across an evening and stay in a narrow
   band. Sprinters front-load and ride the curve down. Both are strategies.
   One of them involves a plan for nine o'clock."
   ON SCREEN: GRAZER - SPRINTER
3. (0:11-0:16) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "Grazer or Sprinter. Comments. This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: GRAZER OR SPRINTER?

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 2 and 3 only. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy
stroke, lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on the labels. 250px clear at
bottom, 120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. Sparse strings.

DO NOT: No smoking, no product, no packaging, no paraphernalia. No medical
claims and no dosing guidance. No real brand names. No endorsement of either
type.

Professor High — THE TAXONOMY — TAX-003
Runtime: 17 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE MAXIMIZER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-maximizer-v1 if you have built it, or
  cast ANY Cantina character who reads as: confident, decisive and completely
  wrong — optimising for the biggest number.
- THE ORACLE — SWAPPABLE. Use the-oracle-v1 if you have built it, or cast ANY
  Cantina character who reads as: reclined and generous, explains your own
  experience to you with total confidence.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Nature-documentary deadpan, species identification. NO preference shown.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD on both already answering. No title card, no
logo. No on-screen text before 0:05.

ENVIRONMENT: A stylized generic dispensary counter with a backlit menu board.
No product visible. No real brand names or logos. Professor High is cut in
from his lab.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:05) COLD OPEN. Locked wide two-shot at the counter.
   SAYS (ORACLE): "Same as always."
   SAYS (MAXIMIZER): "I've never bought the same one twice in my life."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:05-0:12) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   Single two-word card, lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "Loyalists have one data point and forty repetitions of it.
   Tourists have forty data points and no repetitions. Neither of them has
   ever compared the two panels."
   ON SCREEN: LOYALIST - TOURIST
3. (0:12-0:17) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "Loyalist or Tourist. Then go look up what yours actually is.
   This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: LOYALIST OR TOURIST?

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 2 and 3. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy stroke,
lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on the labels. 250px clear at bottom,
120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. Sparse strings.

DO NOT: No product visible. No smoking. No medical claims. No real dispensary,
brand, producer or lab names. No endorsement of either type.

Professor High — THE TAXONOMY — TAX-004
Runtime: 18 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE FIRST-TIMER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-first-timer-v1 if you have built it, or
  cast ANY Cantina character who reads as: small, upright and sincere, asks
  the question nobody else will.
- THE OLD HEAD — SWAPPABLE. Use the-old-head-v1 if you have built it, or cast
  ANY Cantina character who reads as: weathered and relaxed, permanently mid-
  anecdote, a credible witness.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Nature-documentary deadpan. This is the one episode where Professor High
comes CLOSE to a verdict, and he flags that he is doing it. Even here he does
not actually declare a winner.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD on both already engaged. No title card, no
logo. No on-screen text before 0:05.

ENVIRONMENT: A stylized generic dispensary counter with a backlit menu board.
NO product visible anywhere — the Old Head leans toward the counter with his
eyes closed but there is nothing in front of him. No real brand names or
logos. Professor High is cut in from his lab.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:05) COLD OPEN. Locked wide two-shot at the counter. THE OLD HEAD
   leans in with his eyes closed; THE FIRST-TIMER reads from a plain sheet.
   SAYS (OLD HEAD): "I don't need a sheet. I can smell it."
   SAYS (FIRST-TIMER): "It says limonene."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:05-0:13) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   Single card, lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "They are doing the same thing. Terpenes are the aromatic
   compounds — the smell is the panel. He is reading it slowly and
   inaccurately, and she is reading it printed."
   ON SCREEN: THE SMELL IS THE PANEL
3. (0:13-0:18) Static chest-up, the faintest smile. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "Nose or Numbers. This is the closest I will come to picking a
   side. This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: NOSE OR NUMBERS?

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 2 and 3. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy stroke,
lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on the labels. 250px clear at bottom,
120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. Sparse strings.

DO NOT: No product visible. No smoking. No medical claims. No real dispensary,
brand, producer or lab names.

Professor High — THE TAXONOMY — TAX-005
Runtime: 17 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE MAXIMIZER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-maximizer-v1 if you have built it, or
  cast ANY Cantina character who reads as: confident, decisive and completely
  wrong — optimising for the biggest number.
- THE FIRST-TIMER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-first-timer-v1 if you have built it, or
  cast ANY Cantina character who reads as: small, upright and sincere, asks
  the question nobody else will.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Nature-documentary deadpan, species identification. NO preference shown
between the two types, even though one is the app's use case — the naming
carries it, not an endorsement.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD on both already answering. No title card, no
logo. No on-screen text before 0:06.

IMPORTANT — PRODUCTION NOTE: The phrase "One of them is a feature in High IQ"
is a launch-dependent line. If posting before the app is live, swap to "One of
them is a habit worth building." The rest of the script is unaffected.

ENVIRONMENT: A stylized generic dispensary counter with a backlit menu board.
No product visible. The First-Timer's phone shows an unbranded generic list —
no readable app UI, no logos. Professor High is cut in from his lab.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:06) COLD OPEN. Locked wide two-shot at the counter. THE MAXIMIZER
   squints up at the board trying to remember; THE FIRST-TIMER reads off her
   phone without hesitating.
   SAYS (MAXIMIZER): "I had a really good one once. It was… green."
   SAYS (FIRST-TIMER): "Mine was limonene-led, twenty-one percent, third of
   March."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:06-0:13) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   Single two-word card, lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "One of them is about to repeat a good decision on purpose.
   The other is about to repeat a coin flip and call it a preference."
   ON SCREEN: ARCHIVIST - AMNESIAC
3. (0:13-0:17) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "Archivist or Amnesiac. One of them is a feature in High IQ.
   This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: ARCHIVIST OR AMNESIAC?

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 2 and 3. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy stroke,
lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on the labels. 250px clear at bottom,
120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. Sparse strings.

DO NOT: No product visible. No smoking. No medical claims. No real dispensary,
brand, producer or lab names. No readable app interface or logo on the phone.

Professor High — THE TAXONOMY — TAX-006
Runtime: 15 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE MAXIMIZER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-maximizer-v1 if you have built it, or
  cast ANY Cantina character who reads as: confident, decisive and completely
  wrong — optimising for the biggest number.
- THE ORACLE — SWAPPABLE. Use the-oracle-v1 if you have built it, or cast ANY
  Cantina character who reads as: reclined and generous, explains your own
  experience to you with total confidence.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Nature-documentary deadpan, species identification. NO preference shown.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD on the arrival, mid-greeting. No title card,
no logo. No on-screen text before 0:05.

ENVIRONMENT: A stylized apartment doorway, warm interior light behind. No
brands or logos. NOTHING is carried, held, smoked or consumed on camera — the
Oracle's hands are conspicuously EMPTY, which is the joke. No product or
packaging visible. Professor High is cut in from his lab.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:05) COLD OPEN. Locked wide two-shot at the doorway. THE ORACLE
   arrives with both hands visibly empty, delighted. THE MAXIMIZER answers
   completely flatly.
   SAYS (ORACLE): "What are we working with tonight?"
   SAYS (MAXIMIZER): "We. Interesting."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:05-0:11) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   Single two-word card, lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "Hosts supply. Guests appear. Every group has a fixed ratio of
   these and it has never once been discussed out loud."
   ON SCREEN: HOST - GUEST
3. (0:11-0:15) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "Host or Guest. Send this to the other one. This is why I'm
   high."
   ON SCREEN: HOST OR GUEST?

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 2 and 3. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy stroke,
lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on the labels. 250px clear at bottom,
120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. Sparse strings.

DO NOT: No product, packaging or paraphernalia in frame. No smoking. No
medical claims. Nothing may be exchanged, offered, or handed over on camera.
No real brand names.

Professor High — THE TAXONOMY — TAX-007
Runtime: 16 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- THE ORACLE — SWAPPABLE. Use the-oracle-v1 if you have built it, or cast ANY
  Cantina character who reads as: reclined and generous, explains your own
  experience to you with total confidence.
- THE FIRST-TIMER — SWAPPABLE. Use the-first-timer-v1 if you have built it, or
  cast ANY Cantina character who reads as: small, upright and sincere, asks
  the question nobody else will.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Nature-documentary deadpan, species identification. NO preference shown.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD on the split screen already established. No
title card, no logo. No on-screen text before 0:05.

IMPORTANT — SHOT 1 IS A VERTICAL SPLIT SCREEN: the identical room rendered
twice, top half in bright morning light with THE FIRST-TIMER, bottom half in
night lamp light with THE ORACLE. Same furniture, same angle, same framing in
both halves — only the light and the person change.

ENVIRONMENT: A stylized living room. No brands or logos. NOTHING smoked, held
or consumed on camera. No product or paraphernalia visible. Professor High is
cut in from his lab.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:05) COLD OPEN. Locked static vertical split screen as described.
   SAYS (FIRST-TIMER, top/morning): "Morning!"
   SAYS (ORACLE, bottom/night): "It's nine. I'm just starting."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:05-0:12) Cut to Professor High in the lab. Static chest-up, deadpan.
   Single two-word card, lower third.
   SAYS (PROF): "Sunrises treat it as a beginning. Sunsets treat it as a full
   stop. The same jar does both jobs and nothing on the label tells you which
   one it is for."
   ON SCREEN: SUNRISE - SUNSET
3. (0:12-0:16) Static chest-up. Closing card.
   SAYS (PROF): "Sunrise or Sunset. This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: SUNRISE OR SUNSET?

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Beats 2 and 3. Bold sans-serif, white with heavy stroke,
lower third, pineapple yellow #D98E04 on the labels. 250px clear at bottom,
120px at top.

AUDIO: Original sound. Sparse strings. Birdsong faintly under the top half,
crickets faintly under the bottom half.

DO NOT: No smoking, no product, no paraphernalia. No medical claims and no
claim that any strain suits any time of day. No real brand names.

Professor High — THE TAXONOMY — TAX-008
Runtime: 28 seconds | 9:16 vertical
CHARACTERS
- professor-high-v1 — LOCKED. Already loaded with his image, voice and
  personality. Do NOT re-describe him — re-describing a saved character is the
  main cause of drift.
- No supporting cast — Professor High alone.
- Any supporting role may be recast freely between packs, never inside one — a
  recast mid-pack turns a format test into a casting test. Briefs and swap
  rules: /social/cast

TONE: Nature-documentary deadpan. This is the pack's capstone and the only
episode that is text-forward throughout. Professor High is presenting findings,
not telling a joke.

IMPORTANT — OPENING: Start COLD on Professor High ALREADY MID-SENTENCE. No
title card, no logo, no greeting.

IMPORTANT — THE CHART IS THE PRODUCT. It must be legible as a still image on a
phone at arm's length, because the entire point is that people screenshot it.
Seven rows, each showing "A or B", accumulating one row at a time in sync with
the dialogue, then holding complete and unobstructed for the full 0:18-0:24.
Do NOT cover any row with a lower-third card during the hold.

ENVIRONMENT: Professor High's lab. Stylized, clean, warm practical lighting.
No product, packaging or paraphernalia anywhere. No brands or logos.

SHOTS + DIALOGUE:
1. (0:00-0:05) COLD OPEN. Static chest-up, deadpan, direct to lens, already
   talking.
   SAYS (PROF): "I have been classifying you for seven weeks. Here is the
   finished chart."
   ON SCREEN: nothing
2. (0:05-0:18) Slow push-OUT as the chart builds behind and around him, one
   row landing per pair spoken.
   SAYS (PROF): "Chaser or Reader. Grazer or Sprinter. Loyalist or Tourist.
   Nose or Numbers. Archivist or Amnesiac. Host or Guest. Sunrise or Sunset."
   ON SCREEN: the seven rows, accumulating in order
3. (0:18-0:24) Static hold on the COMPLETE chart, full frame, fully legible,
   nothing overlapping it.
   SAYS (PROF): "Seven binary axes. One hundred and twenty-eight distinct
   people. Screenshot it, answer all seven, put the string in the comments."
   ON SCREEN: THE FULL CHART (all seven rows visible)
4. (0:24-0:28) Cut back to Professor High, static chest-up.
   SAYS (PROF): "Mine is Reader, Grazer, Loyalist, Numbers, Archivist, Host,
   Sunset. This is why I'm high."
   ON SCREEN: THIS IS WHY I'M HIGH

ON-SCREEN TEXT STYLE: Chart rows in bold sans-serif, white with heavy stroke,
pineapple yellow #D98E04 on the "or". Large enough to read on a phone. Keep
250px clear at the bottom and 120px at the top so the UI never covers a row.

AUDIO: Original sound. Sparse strings building slightly as rows land.

DO NOT: No product, no smoking, no paraphernalia. No medical claims. No real
brand names. Do not obscure the chart during the hold.